okay, it's probably because i'm extremely paranoid, but if there's anyone who comes across my blog and thinks they know who i am, will you let me know through person, phone, text, or email? ...please.
i mean, i doubt that anybody who knows me has come across this, but there's always that SLIGHT possibility.
anywho, with that said i just got a text from one of my friends saying,
"are you bi? rumors are circling around..."
what?!?!
okay, now if i were to even hint that i was not straight, he would tell everbody!
he can't keep secrets. besides i don't want to come out to him before girl 1 or girl 2.
i've known them for so much longer and would feel more comfortable telling them first.
i don't know how to answer his text.
he is actually girl 2's boyfriend. so i'm sure she told him about girl 1's dream (see yesterday) and that's why he is asking.
[sidenote: sorry i hadn't given my friends any "names"...i didn't think i'd keep refering to them so often. but girl 1 and girl 2 are from yesterday's entry."
so...i am just a little perturbed. *sigh*
he might even be asking in a joking way too. or maybe a little jokingly and a litle bit seriously. or maybe just seriously. it's always hard to tell the tone through a text.
oh, and just so you know, i hadn't talked to girl 1 at all about her dream since the day i saw her. i was too chicken to bring it back up. she also never texted me today.
but apparently, the dream story just won't go away. and now that i think about it, the boyfriend is probably going to tell some other people about the dream.
...ugh.
isn't it weird how i seem to be coming out to everyone without actually doing it?
it's weird how somebody's dream is potentially outing me!
to be honest, i didn't see myself coming out for a very long time.
what should i do?
i don't know if i'm ready for this!
...eeep!
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3 comments:
Give people code names in your blog. :P
Outed by a dream, that is weird. I guess you can wait and see what happens, it's *only* a dream. Why do people take dreams so seriously?
Hang in there and don't be too hard on yourself. Take whatever time you need to come out on your terms. Be prepared for the are you gay question with a prepared response like "are you kidding" and laugh. You may decide the next day, 5 minutes later, or a year later to come out to that person just do it on your own terms. The "are you kidding" response doesn't have to make you feel like a liar. You haven't said no, you've only deferred from directly aswering the question.
Find some sort of counsellor to talk to and start developing a support system to fall back on during the coming out process.
When you do decide to tell someone who's expressed suspicion or asked the question just be prepared to say that you were not ready yet to go there when they ask. The vast majority of people
i'm paranoid too but i have more reason because i posted pics of my hot friends from highschool...and since i'm a senior i don't need anyone finding out my sexuality lol
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