akward

a few days ago i was in the car with my mom. we were just talking.
when ever i'm with my parents i feel bad because it feels like i'm constantly lying to them by not letting them know who i am. well, that thought is always in the back of my mind, but i must have been thinking about it too much that day.

i began telling her what i was planning on doing later that day.
i wanted to say,
"later today, i want to go to walgreens to get...blah blah blah."

instead, i said,
"later togay...t-togay, togay..toDAY..um, i want to go to walgreens to get...blah blah blah."

talk about akward. as soon as i said "to-gay", i guess i got nervous and couldn't help but stutter.

it felt so akward. i just tried to keep talking and not make a big deal about it.
i don't think she thought anything of it...i think it's just part of my paranoia that made it such a big deal.
i mean, i only said "togay." it's not like i said "i'm gay." lol.
now that would have been akward...but then again, i'd finally be out!